Top Five HPB Gag Gifts

Holiday office parties! Even the Half Price Books headquarters are not immune to them. The tradition is simple–prizes are awarded. Competition is fierce. It is even rumored that some people stay up all night crafting the “perfect” tacky gift.

So what do you do when you are in a bind, searching for the perfect secret “holiday festive being” present? (Is it ok to say the S word?…ok Secret Santa present)


1. Have you thought about making up a funny song or poem or letter and sharing it with your giftee? Free plug for Blank Your Holiday!

2. What about a gift card? Admittedly I have bought gift cards for coworkers and friends just to reap the benefits. Free $5 for every $25? Gimme $100! Shopping done.

3. What about a cool calendar from their favorite bookstore? Just an idea I thought up!

4. Perhaps you are a novice loom-knitter and have crafted some endearing socks showcasing your company’s beloved mascot? Or maybe that was just me. Sigh.

5. Call in sick?

There are a million directions you can go, but here are the Top 5 office gifts we’ve seen at the HPB corporate gag gift exchange:

5. Diagnostic Toilet Seat– A sentimental favorite, this one’s been passed on to the newest employee each year for close to a decade. It comes with a handy color-guide to let you know what your problem is, based on the color of your “evacuation” — it’s never been used and in the original packaging, thankfully!

4. Family Heirloom Fruitcake– HPB stores have stocked these for the 2011 holiday gag-gift season. You are never required to actually eat it– and as a matter of fact you shouldn’t, since it’s a plastic fruitcake model.

3. Mug yourself…make a mug (or tshirt, or tote) with a goofy picture of yourself. Your Secret Santa will always remember you in conjunction with the 2011 holidays!

2. A funny book! What about The History of Farting, paperback edition- this small treasure of a book has been a top-seller at HPB for several years. We have added to the mix the equally hilarious Nose Picking for Pleasure. Just run into any HPB and ask your nearest Bibliomaniac to grab one of these for you. You will not be sorry! Your friends might be, but you will not.

1. Company logo snuggy! It’s as easy at 1-2-3:

            1- Buy 6 yards of fleece in the color of your company’s logo OR mascot character

            2- Stay up all night, not using a pattern and mess up three times. My personal suggestion is a six pack of beer and/or a pot of coffee. This is also an appropriate time to catch up on your DVR.

            3- Glue on hundreds of pom-pom balls to form your company’s logo.

So what’d you give for your gag-gift/white-elephant/Secret Santa gift this year?

 — Becky

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